The pause that refreshes

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night... and temporarily, good bye

The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

Let me preface this adventure in prose by stating, if I boycotted every celebrity, or every "common man",
who I had differences with of a political, philosophical or lifestyle nature, then I would become the most reclusive human on the planet. Hells bells. At times, I disagree with my own conceptual existence.

Last night at the Republican convention, Clint Eastwood was tapped to be one of the ultra pro Romney cheerleaders.

The Good: It's always good to see Clint Eastwood. After all, he is a movie star of the highest magnitude. He is a great director & he is responsible for some of my favorite films.

The Bad: Whoever wrote that speech that Clint gave while supposedly praising Mitt Romney.

The Ugly: The crowd reactions to the mock "conversation" between Clint & President Obama.
They responded like giddy little school girls experiencing their first prepubescent orgasm while watching "The Beatles" perform on Ed Sullivan.
All that was missing was for someone to show up in blackface, resemblant of Ted Danson's infamous appearance at the "Friars Roast" for Whoopi Goldberg a few decades past.

There is a not so thinly veiled aspect of racism running through the Republican party. Explain the peanut throwing incident involving two delegates & a black CNN camerawoman at the convention.
Explain the pictures of Obama with a bone through his nose, or a picture of watermelons strewn on the White House lawn that was featured predominately at "Tea Party" rallies. Explain the disenfranchisement  of minorities through changing voting registration, early voting restrictions, voter I.D. requirements.

Watching the shenanigans at the convention have pushed me over the precipice that is racism.
Watching this election campaign, I must admit that I have become a racist as well.
With all sincerity, I proudly proclaim, I hate the human race. What the fuck happened to us?

The state of the Fair

Went back to The Minnesota State Fair yesterday for the first time in six years. It's not that I don't enjoy going, it's that I've been there before.
I attended the Fair, or as the locals like to boast, " The Great Minnesota Get Together", with my daughter & son- in- law. In mid walkabout, I mentioned to them that I attended more Fairs then their combined ages. (61) A slight exaggeration, but not to far from the truth.
We went on sixth day. It is still relatively clean, although, I noticed that there was a continual presence of clean up crews this time around. Not like years past when it seemed the organizers of the fair were overwhelmed by the number of attendees & the trash they could produce. Of course, everything looks bigger when your a kid.
There were lots of renovations that had taken place in just the last 6 year that were quite noticeable.
The most surprising change was the modernization of the public restrooms. Holy moley, doors on every crapper stall, better lighting, motion activated faucets, individual urinals & the best part, cleaner.
I did eventually find up near "Machinery Hill" (farming equipment), an unrenovated restroom with the giant trough for pissing.  Ah, the good old days.
I shared fried pickles, shared fried gator,  whole hogged devoured a foot long hotdog, slathered in caramelized onions, pork chop on a stick, sno-cone (cherry), several sodas & mucho agua. It was getting warmer & more humid by this time.
A very fine time was had by all, with one minor exception. 5 hours of traversing the acres upon acres of fair grounds with gimpy knees. Short term memory loss made me forget to wear my knee braces, although it is doubtful they would have helped all that much with the excessive walking.
At the end of the time trip, when finally ensconced back home, with 3 ibuprofen surging toward the aches & pains, I settled in my favorite lazy boy chair & immediately dozed off for an hour or so.
It was a delight to reexperience what was one of the highlights of days gone by with my grownup daughter & her hubby. Sadly, this may well be the last Fair that I attend. The cravings for the unhealthy, but so damn good to the taste, high chloesterolic food, does not compensate for the agony of what are, at this point, extremely gimpy knees.  As the time moves on, the aches fade, & the cravings return, I'm sure that some time in the future, I may do it all over again, because it is after all, it is the, " Great Minnesota Get Together."

Piss And Moan

I was in a great mood today until...

If there is a Heaven or a Hell, whichever place we will spend eternity, I hope the Third Worlders will have to spend 24/7 in a driving school.  In the mean time, while you are here on Earth... at least try to learn the fucking rules of the road.
Big mistake - Senior & welfare day at the grocery store. By seniors, I mean those way older then I.
I'm in my mid sixties, & these elders should all be in a home. I realize that grocery shopping is probably
one of the last big thrills for them, they get to go out  & meet the friends etc. For the Christ sake... stop blocking the aisles while you compare aches & pains & your latest bout of constipation. Stop cutting people off to get your prune juice.  Just because you're old, does not excuse your rudeness. You haven't earned that right just because you are old. Above all else... pay attention to other customers & move. Get out of my fucking way. I didn't plan to spend 1 hour in the store, when normally, I'm in & out in 1/2 hour. Where are the "death panels" now that we need them.
Why do I lately get in the check out line behind Welfarers. Time stands still while they sort their groceries according to what gets paid for by which voucher. Check their ID. Check it again. Issue a new voucher. Explain they need cash to pay for certain items not covered by the vouchers. Get a job & find a different store.

And The Winner Is...

AOA Trophy

The Anal Orifice Award was conceived over 40 years ago. The past recipients were known only to a few close friends due to lack of any form of media willing to publish the winner's name
of this coveted trophy. This award is given randomly, with no set timeline.

My thanks to the media giant, Google for their access that allowed me to create my Blog.
Also my thanks to The Arizona Republic for the quotes, & Wikipedia for some of the background of the winner.

The qualifications needed to become a recipient of the AOA, are complex.
The candidates must say or do something so venal, so irresponsible, so vile & ludicrous that those statements or actions are deemed completely abhorrent to the mores of a rational society.

History:
This recipient sponsored "Arizona SB1070" an anti illegal immigration measure, since ruled mostly unconstitutional by a Federal Court. Proposed to deny U.S. citizenship to children born in this country to illegal immigrants. Deemed in violation of the 14th Amendment. Hence, unconstitutional.

In 2006, this recipient called for the renewal of the 1950's immigration enforcement program called "Operation Wetback." Also in 2006, this AOA winner had included in an email to supporters, the text from an article by a white separatist group. The crux of the article was anti-Semitic. Citing "multiculturalism" as a Jewish anti-white conspiracy, as well as the usual Holocaust denial.

The AOA winner was a known associate of J.T. Ready, who allegedly killed his girlfriend, her daughter, 15 month old granddaughter, daughter's fiancé, and himself.  Ready a former Neo-Nazi, was at the time of his death, under investigation by the FBI for domestic terrorist involvement in the shooting to death of immigrants found in the desert.

The recipient became the 1st Arizona State Senator to be removed from office via a recall election.

The past of this xenophobic, although interesting, is not the reason for winning the AOA.

Regarding the Aurora, Colorado theater massacre, this AOA winner wrote on his Facebook page the following: "Someone should have stopped this man. Someone could have stopped this man. Lives were lost because of a bad man, not because he had a weapon, but because no one was prepared to to stop it. Had they been prepared to save their lives or the lives of others, lives would have been saved. All that was needed was on Courages/brave man prepared mentally or otherwise to stop this"

Because of the complete insensitivity to the victims, their families & the survivors. Because of the belief that theater goers should have been armed themselves and recreated "The Gunfight At The O.K Corral". Allow me, with complete distain for the recipient, present the Anal Orifice Award to former Arizona State Senator, Russell Pearce. You, Mr. Pearce, are officially recognized as an Asshole.

As old as my tongue

Sadly, I've reached that age, if someone mentions a three way , the first thing I think of is light bulbs.

If I get much older, the only dating that will interest me, will be Carbon Dating  to determine my age.

I do remember the who, but not the how.  Or the when. 

Stolen joke: 

I recently went to the doctor & had a complete physical. The doctor told me that I had the body of a 40 year old.  I should give it back because I'm getting it all wrinkled.

But, seriously, folks.  Dr. Shewin B. Nuland has authored a best selling book entitled, " The Art of Aging."

What is portrayed in commercials, as a Norman Rockwell-esque experience, in reality, is more of a Salvador Dali or Jackson Pollock type of existence. Much more surrealistic & abstract. Aside from the usual amount of regrets & more gaffes then Mitt Romney's campaign, I have had & am having a  pretty 

good life. My health is good. There are the usual aches & pains, which I've had most of my life, mostly due to the false belief of immortality you have as a youth. I do the same things I did when I was younger, except not as often. The recovery time is a bitch.

With more introspection, (if I wanted), I'm sure there are a few things that I would have done differently. However, if I could do it over again, I would. Exactly as I did before. 

The mantra of Sinatra doing it "My Way",  or Popeye's " I am what I am", for me, has transcended

beyond the cliche.

In my case, the adage that "life is short", is the furthest thing from the truth. I am having a Capra type of life. It is a long, sweet ride. The whole time, I've been holding an "E ticket." 

Peace & Rock On.

And the horse you rode in on...

Michele Bachmann, for her McCarthy-esque attack on the Obama administration & the Federal Government regarding infiltration by members of the "Muslim Brotherhood", at the highest level.  In particular, a member of Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's staff.  Once again, a publicity seeking right winger, attacks the integrity of individuals without anything resembling proof. Using the weapons of paranoia, innuendo, and outright lies, this disgraceful act by a disgraceful  member of the United States House of Representatives is becoming the norm for certain factions in this country, who just can't get over the fact that a black person holds the highest office in the country. Sadly, but not totally unexpected, Bachmann is joined in this attack by four other members of the House of representatives.  Reps. Trent Franks R-Ariz, Louie Gohmert R-Tex, Thomas Rooney R-Fla & Lynn Westmoreland R-Ga.

This "plantation mentality", the South shall rise again, cracker, racist bullshit demands repudiation.
Even Sen. John McCain (America's sorest loser, AKA. Grandpa Grumpy) slammed Bachmann's action on the Senate floor. McCain referred to  Bachmann's charges as "sinister".
Taking a lesson from the Fox News Network by framing their "fair & balanced  opinions  as a question, allow me to follow suit.
Isn't it about time we took a page out of the John Wilkes Booth playbook? Sic Semper Tyrannis.
Shame on you Michele Bachmann & your gang of four. Your behavior is frightening. History continues to repeat itself.

This,That, & The Other... Ad Infinitum

This: A man walks into a bar, orders a drink & says to the bartender,"All Republicans are assholes."
A man at the end of the bar says, " Hey, I heard that, & I'm offended." The first man asks,
" Why, are you a Republican?"  The other man replied. "No. I'm an asshole."

That: Willard Mitt Romney is a double threat. A politician & a corporate big whig. Just the kind off person to sell out the country to the highest bidder. No problem with having a moral compass. As we know, those types of slime have sold their souls for a few dollars without any regrets.

The Other: Another severe storm hit tonight. Winds in excess of 60 MPH's. Rain falling, as "The Yardbirds" once sang, " Over, Under, Sideways, Down." Broken tree limbs, leaves all over the ground. Looks like the neighborhood was put through a shredder. Lost power for 1 1/2 hrs. Second severe storm in week and a half. Last time lost power for 11 hrs. We rarely lose power. Maybe 5 times in the 29 yrs in this neighborhood. If this isn't a sign of infrastructure decay, I cannot give a better example.

Ad Infinitum: Got a new computer: A Mac Mini. The old one, after 4+ years was so infected with computer type issues, that it was time to send it to the vet & have it put down.
The best thing about the Mac Mini is the ease of use. No need for the bullshit (which causes most computer problems) Windows. I refuse to download any Windows programs. The hard part of learning to navigate the Mac Mini, is to unlearn all of the unnecessary crap you have to know to deal with Windows.  Shame on you Bill Gates for a variety of reasons.
P.S. Will you & your wife stop donating millions to third world countries. This country, the place you live in & have reaped the multiple benefits from, could use the money. Adopt a fucking highway, build
a bridge. Donate to food shelves, high schools. Buy some state of the art medical equipment for the VA hospitals.Whatever. Keep the money at home. What ever you are currently giving to the USA, it's not enough.

But, Then Again: Politicians seem to think the American people are like mushrooms... they like to be kept in the dark, and fed a lot of shit.



Peace & Rock On.

Welcome to my world... by invitation only

Last week the daughter & I went to see Kristin Chenoweth in Mpls.
Time for me to get my Gay on.  Absolutely fabulous & then some.
Two hours of unrestrained Show Business, with the accent on Show.
An incredible performance. She hit some notes that had me worried
that my glasses would shatter. Great segues between songs, with some
 local stories about her days at the Guthrie Theater & her first encounter
 with the Minnesota winter her jabs at ABC executives etc. She is every
 male heterosexuals (me) dream.
Talented,voice, humor, looks & incredible body. One of the best non
 Rock concerts in my decades. Thanks for the goosebumps. You go Girl.

After having my fill of political pundits & their incredible lack of civility,
I have created my own version of an opinion show. It's a bit radical (surprise),
 but it will end the frustration of watching these rude bastards. It is called... CUT OFF
The premise is no different from any of the similar gabfests, with one major
 improvement. The caveat is ... the guests are allowed to present their views.
No matter how insane, no matter what political party they represent, no matter
what. They can agree or refute with out interruption. Period. If someone
of the opposition interrupts the presentation of a differing view, their microphone is CUT OFF.
They are unable to have anything broadcast for 3 minutes. If it happens a
second time... Cut Off for 5 minutes. If they are foolish enough to do it a third time,
they are escorted out of the studio by security. All televised. They are also banned
 from further appearances for 6 months. This just does not include the obvious
 rudeness of talkus interruptus... it includes the split screen shaking of one's head,
the smirk,  & the complete lack of originality. If a pundit repeats themselves a third time
or spouts their political party's standard talking points. CUT OFF.
Of course, the host is allowed to politely interrupt, but only to the ask the person to expand,
or to ask a question of clarification.  The public might actually get to hear something.

I've devised the perfect place for those distressed from the world around us.
A getaway, a resort where you can forget the usual things that plague the individual
living in this inane world. A place to rest, to recharge. A place to get away from the stench
 of every day Bullshit. The name of this haven... The Downwind Unwind.

Welcome to the Torrid Zone. Here in Minnesota, we are experiencing 7th straight day
 of 90+ degree temps with oppressive humidity. No change in sight for the next 4 or 5 days.
The patio door is steamed over. Go outside and your glasses fog up from the humidity.
Overnight lows are in the 70's or 80's. What climate change. Great time to be a cactus salesman.
Holy moley,  In the words of Buster Poindexter...It is hot, hot, hot.

Happy Birthday United States Of America.

So long till next time. Peace & Rock On.

Father's Day 2012

On Father's Day, the daughter & I were going to go to see Kristen Chenoweth in concert. Alas, last minute concert postponed due to health problems. ( laryngitis)
Andi (daughter) calls up & says, she & Spider (son-in-law) are coming over to have a Father's Day Bar-B-Q.
What a pleasant treat.

Burgers & hot dogs, pasta salad etc. & I don't have to do a damn thing except revel in the gloriousness of not doing nothing.
After the feast, after the DVD, we settled down for the  catch up, story embellishments, & B.S. &  a cocktail or two. This has become a family standard. I wouldn't trade it for anything.
I must pause momentarily. and say that Andi is creative, funny, intelligent, & sarcastic. Those who know her will find no fault in that assessment. Do not get her pissed off.
Do not tell her that black is white, up is down, or wrong is right. She knows there is no just in justice. She's a bit of a no nonsense liberal.
The best thing I love about her.... she does not suffer fools lightly.
Whilst doing our usual, (maybe it was the day), Andi said the most heartfelt thing I have ever heard her say.
She thanked me for making her what she is today. She was proud of me. Right back at you. It's not quite a new tie or a power tool, but I'll take it. Gladly.
Thank you Andi,...I love you.

Odds And Endz

6/6/2012 is the 68th anniversary of  "Operation Overlord". That was the code name for the invasion of western Europe by allied forces. "D- Day". We, the descendents of WW ll veterans can only imagine the insanity & the hell these heroic military personnel withstood. Thank you for your sacrifices.

I saw my first firefly this evening at approximately 10:05 PM, CDT. This is the earliest that I have seen one. Couple that with the growth of the garden, it's going to be a hot, warm Summer.

Scott Walker, Republican Governor survived the recall election in Wisconsin. He beat back the challenge of Democrat Tom Barrett. Walker took in over 60 million bucks from out state interests. (Koch brothers etc.) Barrett won the nomination over the union endorsed candidate. Remember, the unions started the recall process & the establishment Dems., usurped the process & put their same old, same old, good old boy up as opposition. The Dems. promptly changed the tone of the campaign from workers rights to the usual, political bullshit.
Again this proves that the Republicans are the party of the corrupt, while the Democrats are the party of the incompetent. Not to worry. It is only a matter of weeks before a Grand Jury indicts Walker for " campaign finance malfeasance, embezzlement of veterans funds, bid-rigging, and even child enticement during the period when Walker served as Milwaukee County Executive, but was running for governor." Walker may have traded the pink slip for an orange jumpsuit.

There is a reason why we have two ears and one mouth.
Think about it.

How many times do I have to hear someones version of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" before I start to regurgitate?

Why are John Sandford's, "Virgil Flowers" novels some of the best thrillers out there ?

What is the appropriate waiting period after a spouse has
passed away, before you actively try to get laid? It's been 6+ months, & even the crack of dawn isn't safe from my lecherous intentions. Apologies to all concerned.

Thanks for the indulgence, & continue to "Rock On".

Thanks for the memories

We're coming up to Memorial Day weekend.
It is more then special retail sales events, the Indy 500 or the unofficial start of Summer.
Memorial Day began after the American Civil War as a way to honor the fallen Union soldiers. It then expanded to honor all who had served and or fallen in the service of their country. Since the start of the 20th century, Memorial Day has evolved into a day in which we remember loved ones who have passed.
My father (WW II veteran) died when I was 6 yrs old. I don't have a lot of memories about him, after all I was just a kid when he died, however, I always tried to take a few moments on Memorial Day to think of him & reflect on what life would have been like if I had the influence of a father figure. How different would my life have been? To me Memorial Day was always, selfishly, a would of, could of, should of.
Well now Memorial Day has taken on another, yet similar meaning.
My beloved wife Karen passed last November. (2011)
I have plenty of memories of our time together, mostly
(90 %) good to fantastic. The lives we shared will always be a part of me, regardless of the day, whether it is designated as an official day of remembrance or whenever. I will be forever grateful for our time together. I am thankful for our wonderful daughter, Andrea & how her life,
her principles, & her beliefs will be a testament to our love for each other & for her.
I still selfishly think, would of , could of, should of.
Take the time this Memorial Day to think of your loved ones. Those who have passed, & those still living.
Peace & Rock on.

There is nothing wrong with your television set. Do not attempt to adjust the picture. We are controlling transmission.

With apologies to "THE OUTER LIMITS" for ripping off part of their intro.
If you overlook the continued dreck the networks force feeds the public,
the current TV season is not without controversy once again.
Two mid season shows on a the alphabet network (ABC), "Good Christian Bitches" (GCB) & "Don't trust the B**** in Apt 23" (Bitch) have come under fire from the Parents Television Council.
The PTC is a conservative watchdog group based in Florida headed up by Brent Bozell III. Bozell is also a regular contributor to FOX NOISE. Bozell also has founded conservative PACS & was a staff member for Pat Buchanan's 1992 presidential campaign. Great credentials.
In the past the PTC has taken on such shows as The Family Guy, CSI, Friends, House, Grey's Anatomy, The 70's Show,The Simpsons, Gilmore Girls, the list goes on.
They even took on the WWE professional wrestling (entertainment ) for excessive sexuality & violence that they deemed inappropriate for prime time. In short, if there is perceived "anti family" transgressions, they are against it.
Some of the shows that the PTC endorsed or endorses are...
7th Heaven, Touched by an Angel, Reba, Wonderful World of Disney, Who Wants to Be A Millionaire, Dancing with the Stars, Sunday Night Football.
You get the idea of what unimaginative TV shows the PTC would like to take over the airways. God help us.
Like most watchdog groups, they have come out against tv shows in the past that haven't even aired yet. Nor had they seen any advanced preview. They just don't like the potential for being offensive. Case in point GCB. Which by the way is a pretty much "nail on the head" skewering of hypocrisy of "Christian" beliefs vs. every day practice.
The PTC is not without it's own controversy, there have been IRS investigations for misappropriation donor funds. Also other ethic issues such as vastly overstating their membership numbers from 12,000 to 1.3 million.
One of their goals is to have the Federal Government make the determination on what is appropriate programming , using the standard set up by the PTC.
Not satisfied with trying to cleanse TV, the PTC is attacking the music industry, YouTube & any other industry that they see as inappropriate.
Solution: If the PTC is so concerned about the effect the media has upon children, turn off the fuckin' TV. Have your children read a book, play games with them, talk to them, spend time with them. The TV is not a baby sitter to oversee your child's development.
That was & will always be the job of the parents, not some loony right wing
hate spouting watchdog. To quote then NRA national spokesman Charlton Heston whilst brandishing a hand gun.... regarding my remote control "From my cold dead hands."

We're having a heatwave, a tropical heatwave

With apologies to Irving Berlin.

Yesterday 3/17/12, we smashed, destroyed, obliterated the temperature high record in the

Twin Towns. 80 degrees. Holy Moley. Painted the fence, cleaned up the garden, went on poop patrol (the dog's, not mine).

Just incredible. Got the fans out & blowing by afternoon. The dog, all of 13 years & counting was running around outside like she was 5 years old. Wearing shorts (me, not the dog).

On days like that, it's why we stay through the winters in Minnesota.

More warmth headed our way this week. I know it all evens out in the end. But for now, let us revel in it. No agenda, no rants, no opinions, no ennui, just enjoying the thrill of an early Spring.

Going to keep this short coz I'm going out in a few hours to work on my tan. Bye, bye & buy Bonds.

You've gotta a lot of balls.... for now

Problem:

Under the guise of protecting American freedom & keeping the big government from interfering with the lives of all freedom loving Americans, the Republican Party, unilaterally

has started their WAR ON WOMEN.

From attempting to deny statutory rape victims access to Medicaid funded abortions.

Passing laws declaring a fertilized egg as a legal person.

Cutting off access to all forms of birth control for women.

Slashing funds for Planned Parenthood.

Forcing women to undergo a transvaginal ultrasound. ( The updated definition of rape put forth by the FBI earlier this year is as follows: “The penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim.”)

You get the general idea.

Solution:

To prevent the need for contraceptive birth control, abortions & all the other periferally related

issues, I propose implementing the immediate neutering of all males, regardless of age etc.

Not only will this eliminate all need for contraceptives, in the long run, it will stop politicians from breeding.

Eventually, the human race will die out. This is not a bad thing, as we sure have screwed the pooch with regards to the home planet.

The real danger is the Fascist intrusive desire to take control of the most sacred right we, as freedom loving Americans hold most dear. Stay the fuck out of our lives & the bedroom.

It's a long & winding road

Last night (3/3/12), I took the first step to some semblance of normalcy since Karen died in November. I began to socialize outside my everyday sphere. I went out to Famous Dave's Blues Club in Mpls. to see some old friends perform a reunion concert. The band was & is

"THE LITTER." I have known, hung out with & followed these guys for 40+ years.

I recently reconnected with a two of the remaining original members (Denny & Zippy). For those unenlightened about the group, go to Wikipedia. In their time, they had the makings of one of the legendary rock bands in the Midwest, with an almost cult like following.

The gig was pretty damn good. Sure, the voices were a little rough due to decades of overindulgence. The instrumentation was sloppy at times, but by nights end, feeding off the crowds' energy & euphoria, they were spot on.

A splendid time was had by all.

It was so nice seeing fans of the band after all these decades. Hello to Marilyn, Kathy, Marge,

Gary, et al.

Kudos to Kenny & the lovely Beth for their continued friendship & the transportation.

A special shout out to the best "gal pal" from high school & beyond, Maureen.

Thank you all for giving me an enjoyable evening & making me feel human once more.

May we all "Rock On" together again.